209A restraining orders can protect children at school

A 209A restraining order, also called an abuse prevention order, is a court order to protect you from being abused by certain other people. You can get a restraining order to protect you or your child. You must show a judge that the person you want a restraining order against has abused either you or your child.

For example, if an abuser 

• hit you or your child, 
• hurt you in front of your child, or 
• threatened to hurt you or your child, 

you could ask for a restraining order against the abuser.

Learn more about 209A Restraining Orders.

A restraining order can protect your children from an abusive parent in many ways.

• If there is no court order about custody of the children from the Probate and Family Court, a restraining order can grant you custody of your children. This custody order can say that the children live with you and that you are the only parent who can make important decisions about their care.
• A restraining order can prevent the abusive parent from contacting your children. This “no-contact” order can apply to all places where your children may be. A judge can order that the abusive parent must stay away from your child's home, school, and/or daycare, as well as order that the abusive parent make no direct or indirect contact with your children.
• If you get a 209A restraining order in a Probate and Family Court, the court can include a visitation order. You can ask that the abusive parent only visit with the children at certain times, or in a supervised setting. Only the Probate and Family Court, not the District Court, can make visitation orders. They can only make visitation orders if you ask for them, not if the abusive parent does.
• A 209A restraining order can include protections to keep your children safe in school or daycare. These orders could say:
  • The abusive parent cannot go to your child’s school.
  • The abusive parent cannot get your child's school records.
  • The abusive parent can’t meet with school staff or be involved in your child’s school or education.

If you want these additional protections, you probably want to ask for the restraining order in a Probate and Family Court. You need to ask for these protections specifically, because they are not automatically given in a restraining order. You need to tell the judge why these additional protections are needed.

• The District Court is not allowed to make visitation orders between the children and the abusive parent. 
• The District Court can make custody and child support orders if there are no current custody or support orders from a Probate and Family Court. 
• If you already have a child support or custody order from a Probate and Family Court, the District Court is not allowed to change those orders unless there is a very clear emergency or risk to the children. It is not common for a judge to do this. But a District Court can still issue a restraining order protecting you from an abusive person.

If you want visitation considered in the restraining order, or if there are custody or visitation orders from the Probate and Family Court that you want changed, you should consider filing for a 209A restraining order in Probate and Family Court.

The Complaint for Protection from Abuse and the Affidavit are the main forms that tell the judge why you need a restraining order. The first page of the Complaint asks for information about you (the plaintiff) and about the abusive parent (the defendant). It also asks you to check what sort of safety protections you want the court to order.

The second page of the Complaint asks for information about your children and asks which protections you want the court to provide for your children.

Some of the more important points to include on the Complaint are:

• If you are asking for any protections for your children from page two of the Complaint, you must check off Box 5 in Section J on page 1.
• If you want custody of the children, check off the box in Section C on page 2 and write the names and birthdates of your children.
• If you do not want the abusive parent contacting your children, check off the box in Section D on page 2 and write the names of your children.
• If you are in Probate and Family Court and want a visitation schedule between your children and the abusive parent, check off the boxes in Section E on page two.

Important

You can ask for orders saying the abusive parent can not contact and has to stay away from any of your children, even if they are not children of the abusive parent. You can only ask for custody and visitation orders for children that you have with the abusive parent.

Learn more about How to get a 209A restraining order, including getting help filling out the paperwork.

The Complaint does not have a specific place to say that you want the abusive parent to stay away from the children's school or daycare. You should put this information in the following places to make sure the judge knows that you are asking for these orders:

• In Box 4b, Section J on page 1 of the Complaint, there is a place to write down the workplace that you want the abusive parent to stay away from. You should write there that you want the abusive parent to stay away from the children's school or daycare, and put the address of each place.
• On page 2 of the Complaint, there is space to write why you do not want the abusive parent to have any contact with the children. This is another place where you can ask that the abusive parent stay away from the children's school and/or daycare.
• In Box 8 in Section J on page 1 of the Complaint, you can ask for any other protections that you want included in the order. For example, write here if you want the abusive person not to have access to your child's school records or not to be able to talk to staff at the school.
• For example:
  • "The defendant may not come in or near the children's school, the Little Red Schoolhouse."
  • "The defendant may not have any access to the child's school records."
  • "The defendant may not have contact with personnel of the Little Red Schoolhouse."

Important

If the abusive parent does not know the exact names and/or locations of the children's school or daycare, you can ask the judge to order that the abusive parent must stay away from those places without listing the specific school names and addresses. You could also ask for the names and addresses of the schools to be “impounded” or kept private.

The most important thing is to tell the judge exactly what protections you need and why. If you do not ask for the abusive person to be ordered to stay away from the children's school(s), the judge will probably not make that order. You should be very specific with the judge about what protections are needed in the restraining order.

If the judge gives you a restraining order which

• protects your children at school, or
• says the abusive parent can’t see school records or contact the school, 

make sure to give school administrators and classroom teachers a copy of the restraining order. Speak with these school officials about what the order means, what protections the order provides, and what the abusive parent is prohibited from doing.

You may also want to provide a photo of the abusive parent and/or put a note in each child's school file about what to do if the abusive parent asks for information about your children. Make sure that the school knows if any of your or your children’s information should be kept secret, like your address or phone number.

It is important to tell the school that your children should not be picked up by anyone without your permission, and that no information about the children should be released without your permission.

School personnel should note (from reading the restraining order) that violations of "no abuse," "no contact," and "stay away" provisions of a restraining order are crimes. They should know that the police should be contacted if the order is being disobeyed at a school.